


Time is a River

by cryptaknight



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Romance, Singapore, Slytherins Being Slytherins, Wedding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-25
Updated: 2017-10-25
Packaged: 2019-01-23 05:04:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12499388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cryptaknight/pseuds/cryptaknight
Summary: During an unusually hot summer, an invitation to Draco's wedding sparks something new for his best friends.





	Time is a River

**Author's Note:**

> Written for hp_drizzle
> 
>  **Pairing(s):** Theo/Pansy, background Draco/Astoria  
>  **Word Count:** 8,009  
>  **Rating:** R  
>  **Warning(s):** None that I can think of.  
>  **Disclaimer:** Harry Potter characters are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.  
>  **Notes:** Slightly EWE. _Not_ Cursed Child compliant, "interview canon" compliant, or Pottermore compliant.

**Time is a River**

"Time is a river which carries me along, but I am the river." -Jorge Luis Borges 

**Then**

_Pansy emerged from the water, giving her head a shake that sent water droplets flying from her newly bobbed hair. Theodore's house elf had spread thick, fluffy towels on the bank nearby, and Pansy made a beeline for them, throwing herself down and turning her face up toward the sun, which beat down with a steady heat that was already beginning to dry her. Squinting down back in the direction of the river that ran through west side of the Nott estate, Pansy could see Theo sitting along the edge, leaning back on his elbows, the rest of his body submerged except for his toes, which poked up through the coursing water. Draco still stood, a few feet away from Theo, his spindly arms wrapped around his skinny body, cautiously sticking a foot in. Despite the unbearable temperatures that had resulted from this ghastly heat wave, he wasn't ready to fling himself into the cooling water the way Pansy had. Pansy watched as Theo cocked his head to the side to look up at Draco, apparently reaching the same conclusion she had. Theodore snaked his hand out, grabbing Draco by the ankle and pulling Draco in before the other boy could even voice a protest. Pansy's laughter rang out in peals when Draco stood back up, hip deep in the water, his shock of white-blonde hair plastered to his forehead, spluttering in Theo's direction while Theo grinned back at him._

_Theodore turned back to look at Pansy, who stifled her laughter and gave him a haughty nod of approval. Really, they were so, so lucky that Theo had this river running through his family's property, and also lucky that Theodore's strict mother had retreated to Singapore for the summer and his busy father didn't much care what they did as long as they didn't destroy anything valuable and he didn't get any disciplinary letters from the Ministry for Magic. Pansy had told her own rather stuffy and proper parents that Theo had invited them over to celebrate the receipt of their Hogwarts letters (which was a silly excuse, really, since the letters had been a mere formality for the three of them, but they hadn't questioned it), and she supposed Draco had made some sort of similar excuse to his parents._

_Still disgruntled, which apparently outweighed any pleasure the cool water offered, Draco trudged back up to where Pansy was sitting, plonking himself down next to her. Pansy held out to him, which he quickly wrapped around himself._

_"You don't like to swim?" Pansy said, reaching a finger out to catch a drop of water that threatened to fall from the tip of Draco's sharply pointed nose, knowing full well what the answer would be._

_Sure enough, Draco scowled and said, "I like to swim. I don't like being forced into it, though."_

_Pansy nodded sympathetically, keeping a smile to herself. Draco didn't like being the subject of pratfalls and he definitely didn't like that Theo had embarrassed him or that Pansy had laughed at him. He didn't like looking foolish. And none of them liked being forced into anything, although that seemed to be mostly what life was- being forced into things they'd rather not do. Pansy was looking forward to school, though she'd never admit to such a swotty thing, if only because it meant Mother wouldn't be around all the time to tell her to sit up straight and to not pull faces and for Merlin's sake to please smooth down that bit of stray hair._

_Seeing that he was abandoned for the moment, Theodore left the water and came up to join them. His exit from the river was more elegant than Draco's, and he was far less disgruntled as he sat down at Pansy's other side._

_Pansy voiced her earlier thoughts aloud- that she was grateful for the availability of the river and the gullibility of their parents. Theodore grinned again, combing his hand back through his thick black hair, which slicked back along the curve of his head._

_"I got lucky that Mum didn't drag me along with her for my cousin's wedding. She would have, if I didn't have to be ready to start school in a few weeks. As it is, she's made me about a zillion appointments for robe fittings and supply shopping. My Remembrall is lighting up every ten seconds, seems like."_

_Pansy was intrigued by the thought of a very fancy Singaporean wedding, and said so. "Wouldn't you rather be at a big party like that, than stuck here in England shopping for quills?"_

_Draco snorted. "Sounds like a bore, if you ask me," he said, before Theo could answer. "Having to be on your best behavior while a bunch of aunties and grannies pinch your cheeks and tell you how much you've grown up."_

_Pansy shook her head. "Boys are so silly. Weddings are loads of fun."_

_Draco snorted again. "Hardly. I'm never getting married, if I can help it."_

_Theodore laughed. "Hah, yes, you are. Your parents have probably already started planning the reception. You know they've been scheming with Pansy's parents since the two of you were born," he said, with all the wisdom an eleven-year-old can muster. "You two will probably get married soon as you finish school."_

_"Yuck," Pansy said, though secretly a happy warmth filled her at the thought. Draco could be very handsome, when he wasn't in a snit, and she liked him- along with Theodore- better than just about anybody in the world._

_"I'm never getting married," Draco insisted._

_Pansy frowned, then closed her eyes, tilting her face back toward the sun. Draco was wrong. Of course he would get married. His parents would make him. And she would marry him, and it would be wonderful because he was one of her best friends and their families got on so well. And she'd wear really gorgeous robes, and put white flowers in her hair, and they'd get married at Malfoy manor in the springtime, and it would be perfect. Happy with this fantasy, she opened her eyes to look at Draco, only to discover his seat at her right was empty. He'd thrown off his towel, running back down to the water. Apparently the perceived dangers of the water were more appealing than wedding talk, she thought, watching him gingerly wade in._

_"And, nah, I wouldn't want to be with my mum." Theodore's voice from her left reminded Pansy he was there. She swiveled her head to look at him. He was as serene as she had been a moment before, basking in the warm sunshine. "Being here right now is perfect."_

_Pansy was quiet a moment, then smiled broadly at Theo. "Being in the water is better." She stood, meaning to join Draco in the river. "Do you really think Draco and I will get married someday?"_

_Theodore shrugged, a motion that already suited him despite his young age. "Who else would he marry?"_

**2010**

The invitation looked innocuous enough, simple classic lettering on cream cardstock, tucked discreetly in a matching envelope with nothing other than Pansy's name on the outside- _Miss Pansy Regina Parkinson_ in swirling script. The note affixed to it was from her mother, and was less innocuous, letting Pansy know the invitation had been delivered to Park Hall, the family home in Wiltshire, and admonishing her for going so long between visits that her mail had been languishing there for a whole week. When Pansy opened the envelope, however, she was glad she'd been able to do so without her mother's keen eye upon her, because her reaction was not necessarily what Dahlia Parkinson would have deemed "ladylike." There might have even been an expletive.

The contents of the invitation were not unexpected. Pansy kept her ear firmly affixed to the ground when it came to the pureblood rumor mill, and there had been rumblings for a while. Even so, it was a punch to the gut to see it all written out in beautiful black and white script: _Miss Astoria Dianthe Greengrass and Mr Draco Phineas Malfoy, together with their parents Mr and Mrs Waldorf Greengrass and Mr and Mrs Lucius Malfoy, request the honour of your presence at their wedding on Saturday, the Seventeenth of July, Two Thousand and Ten, at half past five in the afternoon._ It made her a bit weak in the knees, really, and not out of joy on Draco's behalf.

Astoria Greengrass. She was a perfectly inoffensive girl who would have finished school several years behind them, had her parents not wisely yanked her and her sister out of Hogwarts and shipped them off to Beauxbatons at the first whiff of Death Eater chicanery. Instead she'd returned to Great Britain in her early twenties, graceful and well-educated, without the slightest stain of darkness to mar a reputation as fair and lovely as her skin and hair, a girl from a family listed among the Sacred 28 by Theodore's great-grandfather who had escaped any stigma associated with the Dark Lord (while not being a Weasley). She was exactly right for Draco, in other words; he needed to marry someone like Astoria Greengrass in order to repair his own tattered reputation, still suffering twelve years after the Battle of Hogwarts. He might even actually be in love with the girl, if her personality measured up to her impeccable lineage and social capital. He probably was. Draco had a penchant for delicate things, things that made him feel protective and important, while also being unable to resist a woman with a quick smile and an even quicker wit. Astoria Greengrass seemingly ticked all the boxes, from Pansy's admittedly limited knowledge of her. It was a good match.

It still stung.

Pansy had spent most of her life believing that she would be the woman someday sending out this invitation. Even after Draco had completely withdrawn from her during sixth year, she'd thought- or at least hoped- that when he got things sorted out they would come back together, stronger than ever. Then the Battle had happened, and Pansy had made her very foolish choice to save herself and everyone she held dear at Potter's expense. She'd been publicly forgiven, but wizarding society was not much for forgetting. It hadn't helped that her father had faced a trial for his participation in Voldemort's cadre of Death Eaters, nor that her mother had completely retreated to Park Hall when she was not retiring to one of the family properties on the continent. At least they'd kept most of their money, vulgar though it was to even mention such things. Draco had faced much of the same censure, albeit softened somewhat by his mother's lie, which had saved Harry Potter's life. The narrative had become that Draco hadn't had a choice, or much of one, at any rate. Pansy had acted of her own free will. Everyone knew that. A relationship with Draco was impossible. They remained good friends, the best of friends. But nothing more.

Now Pansy was thirty, unmarried, and without any real romantic prospects. Her mother had tried to discreetly ask her if she was a lesbian once, to both their mortification. She was not a lesbian, random wild nights post-Hogwarts aside. Pansy liked men just fine. She just hadn't found one worth getting serious with. Draco was freshly thirty, himself, but standards were always unfairly different for men.

She knew she had to accept the invitation. She took the response card from the envelope, intending to go ahead and RSVP with a yes. No plus one, though she was evidently entitled to a date. As she picked up the envelope, however, she noticed that there was another missive in addition to the note from her mother. It was just a bit of folded over paper with her name scrawled across the front. She recognized Theodore's handwriting instantly.

_I escaped the heat and humidity in Singapore only to discover it is very nearly just as beastly here in the UK. Fancy a swim? T._

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Even with Floo or a portkey, Theodore found travel from Asia to Great Britain disorienting, thanks to the time difference. Usually he gave himself at least a full 48 hours to recover. When a week had gone by after he'd received his invite to Draco's wedding without any word from Pansy, however, Theo had surmised that these were desperate times which called for desperate measures. He'd penned off his note to her almost immediately after touching British soil.

'Just as beastly' may have been a bit of an exaggeration, but it was true that England was experiencing warmer than usual temperatures, enough to justify an invitation to cool off in the river that ran through his estate without his intentions being obvious. A dip or two in the river had become a summertime ritual for him, Pansy, and Draco during their school years, and though the occasions had become fewer and further between as they'd gotten older and life had gotten busier and more complicated, they'd still made time at least once every summer to pause and enjoy the water. Theo had not sent an owl to Draco this time. Pansy had always seemed to appreciate their swims most of all, especially when the going got a bit rough for her, and this seemed like it might be one of those times.

There was something very final about an engraved invitation.

Theodore had his house elf prepare a basket of food and headed down to the spot along the river bank that they favored. There was a large shade tree; one of the branches overhung the water, and one summer when they were fourteen Draco had affixed a rope to the branch, so they could swing out and splash down into the water. At fourteen Draco had overcome most of his childhood fearfulness, overcorrecting into arrogance and overconfidence; thankfully, as an adult, Draco had found a pleasant middle ground. The rope still swung from the branch, a reminder of bolder times. Theodore laid down a blanket under the tree and uncorked the chilled white wine Middy had packed, pouring two glasses. Pansy did not keep him waiting long, Apparating in with a pop, and she gratefully took a glass from him and took a swig before even saying hello.

"I hope you have on a swimsuit under that get up," Theodore said lightly.

Pansy looked down at her floral print sundress, then handed her glass back to him. "I'll be right back."

Torn between amusement and bemusement, Theo watched her Disapparate and reappear, this time with a one-piece swimsuit on, covered by some sort of filmy robe. She must have been quite flustered, to still be so mentally distracted a week after receiving Draco and Astoria's invite. He hadn't planned on asking her about it, but given her apparent state of mind…

"You've gotten your invitation, then?" he asked, careful to keep his voice matter of fact.

"Just today, actually." Pansy sighed, accepting her wine back. Theo felt some relief at her comment. Her demeanor made much more sense now. "The bint had it sent to Park Hall. I've been staying in town."

In London, she meant. Theodore was aware that Pansy kept a flat in the city, away from her parents and closer to her work at St. Mungo's. Which was why he'd sent his own note there. Draco should have known, too, but perhaps he hadn't apprised his fiancee.

"Oh, good," he said with a chuckle. "I'd gotten mine a week ago and was rather alarmed I'd not heard from you."

Pansy sniffed, taking another sip of wine. "Well. It's not like I'm going to off myself over it, am I? We've been expecting this for a while, and I've got other things to focus on. But you're right, I probably would have owled you immediately, if your note hadn't been delivered at the same time as my mum's." She paused. "Did he ask you to stand up with him?"

Theo nodded. "Best man, in fact. I couldn't say no. I wrapped up some loose ends at work and headed home so I could make myself available."

"Loose ends that involved billions of galleons, no doubt." Pansy's look was cheeky. Most of what she understood about Theodore's business could fit on the tip of her wand, but she knew the scope of it was staggering. Theodore was modest, though, and he'd never brag.

"Something like that. All dreadfully boring." Theodore actually found international trade thrilling, but he knew it wasn't an opinion shared by most of his friends. Going back to Pansy's earlier remark, he asked, "Work is keeping you busy, then?"

"It really is. We had a five-year-old with the nastiest case of dragon pox in; he has an immune disorder, and the poor thing was unable to take most of the usual potions. It was really touch and go for bit." Pansy had visibly relaxed, now that the topic had shifted. "I got a potion sorted out for him, though. He went home with his parents just yesterday."

Theo was impressed, although he knew if he said so, Pansy would wave him off. She was one of the best pediatric Healers at St. Mungo's, despite a complete lack of encouragement from her family and a heavy bias against her throughout her training and apprenticeship. And yet a simple invitation from an ex-flame could send her low. The human condition was one that was difficult to solve with a potion, unfortunately.

Distraction, however, might prove more effective.

Theodore stood, stripping down to his swim trunks. "C'mon, then. Into the water, then we can polish off this bottle of wine and whatever goodies Middy has packed for us."

They did exactly that, Pansy as usual wading out to the center of the river, where it was deepest, and letting the water sluice around her shoulders. Theodore noticed that her hair was quite a bit longer than he'd been used to; Pansy had tied it in a topknot to keep it from getting wet. Theo lounged at the river's edge, as he typically did. As he had since they were fifteen and Pansy's body had suddenly had a bit more curve than it had the summer before, he tried not to stare at her. She was lovely, splashing in the water, but she was not for him. Once she'd been Draco's. Now it had been too long for anything between them to change. Besides, he didn't think his mother would approve, and he didn't want to cause Pansy any more pain than she'd already experienced at the hands of an older woman who'd decided she was not suitable. She deserved better.

Once they'd had their fill of the water, they did as Theo had promised, lounging on the blanket under the tree.

"So have you sent in your acceptance?" Theo asked, once Pansy had been lulled by more wine and some delectable pastries.

"Not yet." She sighed, rolling to lay on her back. "I was about to, when I saw your note. I will, of course. I'm just not certain if I should accept just for myself, or delude myself by adding the plus one in hopes that a date might wander along." The smile that curved her lips was rueful.

"I don't have a plus one," Theodore said. "Why don't we go together? Strength in numbers, or something."

"Oh, Theo." Pansy pushed up on her elbows so she could lean down and press a kiss to Theo's cheek. "You're so good to me. I declare you my favorite best friend."

Theodore found himself laughing. "I should think so. Draco has got to've gone down several points, yeah? No river, and the sod has gone and gotten himself engaged."

"Just so," Pansy said pertly, lying back down. She felt better than she had since laying her hands on that blasted envelope.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Upon spying the bridesmaids robes Astoria had picked out, Pansy was filled with relief that Draco had not asked her to be part of the wedding party. Daphne Greengrass and a handful of women that Pansy assumed had been in Astoria's year at Hogwarts were decked out in pale green, a colour far too close to the hideous lime green robes Pansy had to wear at work. The cut and style was flattering enough, Pansy admitted grudgingly, but green was a colour she made a deliberate effort to avoid in her free time. Seven years of green at Hogwarts and now twelve at St. Mungo's was quite enough.

Draco's mother loved the colour green. _Kiss arse,_ she thought, pursing her lips. Turning to her left, she caught Theodore smirking at her, and she smoothed her features, knowing that he might as well have read her mind.

"Quite the turn out," he said blandly, looking about. "Not that I expected a small, quiet affair."

"If anyone so much as looks at me sideways, I'm going to hex them," Pansy warned. She was feeling very self-conscious, sitting there on the groom's side of the room, knowing that people saw her as the jilted ex - never mind the fact that she and Draco hadn't been an item since the middle of sixth year.

"Chin up," Theodore said, giving her hand a pat. "There will be cocktails after."

Indeed, there were; Pansy took some sort of martini (green, of course) from the first tray that floated by, congratulating herself on making it through Draco and Astoria's vows without violating her own Healer vows. There was still a cocktail hour, dinner, and a reception to get through, but at least there would be freely-flowing alcohol. A saving grace.

Theodore led Pansy to a convenient corner, where they could observe the room and make catty remarks to one another about the other attendees. It was a favourite pastime of Pansy's, and he supposed it might get her out of her own head. She'd sat positively stone-faced through the ceremony; he'd held her hand the entire time, but he didn't even think she'd noticed.

"That one there," he said, pointing to an older woman wearing mauve, frilly robes and enough jewelry to stock a small store.

Pansy swirled her drink in her glass, taking a sip while she thought.

"Mmmm. She's a third cousin to the Greengrasses, on their father's side," Pansy started, making up a history for the woman off the cuff. It was a game they'd played among themselves for as long either one of them could remember. "She ran off with a sailor. Total disgrace. Family disowned her. But then! The cousin and her sailor lover found a buried treasure, which made them galleonaires. The sailor died ten years ago, and the family accepted her back. She wears pieces of the treasure at all times to spite the family."

"Oh, excellent!" Theodore grinned sharkishly. "Does she even wear bits of treasure to bed?"

"She keeps the whole kit and caboodle under her bed, of course," Pansy decided. "And she's left instructions with her solicitor that when she dies, the treasure is to be reburied so her fickle family will never see a single gemstone."

Theodore raised his glass, toasting Pansy's effort. "My turn."

Pansy narrowed her eyes and looked around the room. Her gaze settled on a stodgy looking young man with ginger hair. She gestured toward him discreetly.

"Him," she said, with an impish look at Theodore.

"Ah, Ignotus. Clearly a work mate of Draco's. Little does our friend know that Ignotus there is a renowned fairy hunter in his spare time, and keeps an active subscription to the Quibbler."

Pansy giggled, covering her mouth with her hand.

They kept on like that, throughout the cocktail hour and an elaborate but incredible dinner. Pansy knew it for the distraction it was, but she was grateful to Theodore for providing it. By the time Draco and Astoria had cut the cake, which was a towering confection that clearly was reinforced with magic to prevent it falling over, they'd given histories to almost every attendee not already personally known to them.

Running out of stories just so happened to coincide nicely with Pansy's very last mouthful of cake. She hadn't intended to eat the whole piece, just to have a little taste, but the cake was so scrummy and Theodore was so entertaining that she'd run out of cake before she'd quite even realized it. Before she could even become self-conscious about it, Theo was standing, holding his hand out to her.

"Shall we show them how it's done?"

The wide smile that curved Pansy's mouth was answer enough.

The summer before fourth year, someone having put a bug in Narcissa Malfoy's ear about the upcoming Triwizard Tournament and requisite Yule Ball, Narcissa, Pansy's mum, and Mrs Nott, along with a handful of other pureblood parents, had insisted the children have dancing classes. Some of their group had been hopeless at it, of course, but a handful of them had excelled at the precise steps and elegant turns. Pansy and Theodore had been among that handful.

Theo took Pansy's hand, his other hand resting at her waist, and without any discussion between them, began leading her in a waltz, spinning her about the room. It made Pansy a bit giddy, truth be told, and more so with each song they moved through. She'd never spent such a lengthy amount of time holding Theodore so close, and he really was a marvelous dancer. He made her feel small and graceful and gorgeous. She was sorry when the musicians announced a break, though the moment they stopped moving she realized how hot she was, and noticed the perspiration beading on Theodore's brow. She pulled him toward a balcony she knew was off to the left of the ballroom (she'd hidden there a number of times, holding still as possible behind the heavy curtain, while Draco searched high and low for her), thinking they could both use some air.

Breathless, she leaned over the edge of the balcony, testing her fearlessness as she did every time she was out there. "Hot as the devil, isn't it?"

"Your dancing didn't help," Theodore said cheekily. They'd gotten a bit racier when the music had changed styles after the older couples had retired from the dance floor.

"I can't help it," she said, sticking her face out with her chin up, trying to catch whatever breeze there might be. "I love dancing, and when do I ever get a chance to do it any more?" She turned back to Theo, her eyebrow hiked up, daring him to come up with a pithy reply.

He moved closer, leaning back against the railing so they were nearly facing each other while standing side by side. A champagne tray found them on the balcony, and Theodore plucked two flutes from it before sending it back on its way. Pansy took the champagne gratefully- any beverage that would cool her off was more than welcome.

Sipping the champagne also gave her something to do with at least one of her hands and her mouth. She was aware of Theo tonight in a way she'd never really been before, and she didn't trust herself, not with the emotions of being at Draco's damned wedding hanging overhead.

"You should come with me to Singapore," Theodore said, and he reached for Pansy's free hand without really thinking about it. He'd just been holding on to her on the dance floor, and it seemed natural at this point to touch her. "The nightlife there is incredible."

"Mmmm. I'm sure your mother would love that, you turning up with me on your arm." Pansy found Theodore's mother entirely too intimidating, for all that she was as small in stature as Pansy was.

"My mum likes you. She's known you almost your whole life," Theodore pointed out, moving imperceptibly closer. His thumb traced a pleasant pattern over the back of Pansy's hand.

"Knowing me here in England and you bringing me to Singapore are two very different things."

Pansy turned slightly and tipped her head back to look at Theodore. He was very close.

Theo didn't answer her, mostly because Pansy was probably right, but also because she was looking at him very intensely and he didn't want to talk about his mother just then.

Pansy felt very much like something was going to happen just then, something she'd never considered but suddenly very much wanted. Theodore's hand was so nice on hers; it should have made things even hotter and more uncomfortable, but somehow his hand was cool and smooth despite the clinging heat that surrounded them. His face was so near, it wouldn't take much, just a going up a bit on her tiptoes, which she was doing almost as soon as the thought passed through her mind.

Her mouth was a fraction of an inch from his when she heard- and felt- him breathe, "Pansy."

"Hmmmm?" She hesitated, just the tiniest moment.

"We shouldn't."

It was like being doused with a bucket of cold water, which might be refreshing otherwise, but not in the context of whatever it was crackling between them. Pansy drew back sharply, pulling her hand from his.

"I'm so sorry," she said, though her sharp tone was at odds with the sentiment. "Champagne, you know!" She set the glass down abruptly on the balcony rail. "And this heat. It's buggering my senses." She took a deep breath. "I think I should go. I've put in enough of an appearance." She nodded decisively, although Theo had not asked her a question. "Tell Draco to have a lovely honeymoon."

She stepped back, pulling her wand from a hidden pocket in her gown, and gave it a purposeful swish, apparating before she could second guess herself or Theodore could get in a word in response.

Theodore was left staring bemusedly at the spot where seconds earlier, Pansy had been. He thought that he'd probably just bolloxed things up pretty badly. He'd panicked, not sure if he was ready to cross that line between Pansy and him, even if he'd been thinking a lot about how she'd looked emerging from the river in her swimsuit. He turned and leaned his forehead against the cool stone of the balcony rail. He could easily blame the heat and the champagne, too, but he rather thought this was coming from him, something he'd unleashed that he needed to get under control.

He also knew he needed to locate Pansy, and explain himself to her, before she started beating herself up the way she tended to.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

It turned out that Pansy wasn't too terribly difficult to find. Theodore knew where to seek her out when the temperatures got too high.

Sure as anything, when he apparated near the river on his own property, he could dimly make out Pansy's silhouette, up to her waist in the water. When he walked closer, he saw her gown pooled on the grass near the river's edge. He saw that her underthings were also scattered on the lawn near her dress.

Theodore had every intention of finding Pansy, having a heart to heart, and parting as the dear friends they had always been, for as long as he could remember. What he did, however, was strip off his own shoes and clothing and stride determinedly into the water, pulling Pansy close the moment he reached her, her wet skin sliding against his as he hauled her up against him, his mouth slamming down on hers.

Perhaps Pansy should have been surprised, should have reacted with lady-like shock at finding herself accosted by a very naked man, at her lips being bruised by the intensity of his kiss. But she just wrapped her arms around him, her hands sliding over his shoulders and up his neck to curl into his hair. Maybe she'd hoped for this result when she'd flounced off, peeled off her gown, and gone into the water. Maybe this had been brewing between them. She wasn't going to question it. His mouth felt far too good, especially when he softened the kiss a little, and she could sigh into his mouth with pleasure.

"I want you," he growled, with an edge of desperation, the earlier panic still nibbling at him.

"Yes," was all she could manage in return, but he seemed to understand.

His mouth found hers again.

Somehow they came out of the water, and made it to the grass that lined the edge of the river. There it was easier for Theodore to admire Pansy, to run his hands all along her body and to follow them with his mouth. It was definitely easier for him to slide inside her, especially because she lifted her hips eagerly to accommodate him. It was also easier to roll, at some point, so Pansy could sit astride Theodore, rocking with abandon while the moon shone down on them.

After, they went back into the water to clean off, to kiss some more, to twine themselves around each other. When they broke apart, Pansy splashed Theodore playfully, still full of wonder that there was this familiarity but also something entirely new. Theodore returned the splash, then kissed her again.

Finally, because it was late, and because they couldn't stay outside naked forever, as much as they might want to, they got dressed, pausing every so often to steal another touch, another kiss.

"I'll owl you," Theodore said, before Pansy disappeared again.

She nodded, and vanished.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Theodore did not owl Pansy.

Theodore went to Singapore, instead.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Pansy thought about owling Theodore.

Pansy buried herself in work, instead.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Claudine Lim Nott surreptitiously surveyed her son. He was certainly down in the mouth about something, but she knew from experience that he would not tell her without a great deal of prodding, and then he'd be unhappy with her for prodding. He hadn't come to her to solve all his problems since puberty had hit. So instead of asking Theodore why he looked so incredibly glum, she regaled him with stories about a trip she had taken to Hong Kong with several of her friends and showed him a few new art pieces she'd acquired. He chuckled in all the right places in her tales and dutifully admired the priceless beauty of her acquisitions, but Claudine could see in his eyes that Theodore's mind was elsewhere. Finally she could take it no longer, and asked him outright.

"What is troubling you, Theodore? Men only ever look so perturbed over money or women, and since our family accounts are very healthy, I can only assume it must be a woman."

Theodore's mouth set into that grim line that Claudine detested. It was the same face his father had worn any time he was unhappy with a line of conversation. The grimace, along with Theodore's towering height and broad shoulders, were all that he had taken from his father - physically, at least. The rest of him was pure Lim. She and Thaddeus had made a gorgeous son, if she did say so herself. Theodore's personality was more like hers, as well. Which was probably for the best, given some of the decisions his father had ended up making.

After a few moments of stoic silence, Theodore smoothed the grimace from his face, his mouth relaxing. He slumped back into his chair and accepted a delicate cup filled with tea from a tray that floated nearby.

"A woman," he admitted.

Claudine's mind raced. She'd introduced him to any number of girls when he'd last been in Singapore, believing that at age thirty Theodore was ripe for marriage and the production of grandchildren. Theodore hadn't seemed particularly taken with any of them, however, his behavior around them only polite and charming. So it wasn't likely to be one of them, more the pity. They'd been lovely girls, from good families, all of them.

"Someone back in England?" she asked, broaching the topic delicately.

Theodore nodded, sharply and decisively. "Yes. You know her, actually." He cleared his throat. "It's, ah, Pansy."

"Pansy Parkinson?" That made Claudine frown. She tried not to frown, in general, because it put a terrible line between her brows. "Is it serious?"

Not that there was anything wrong with Pansy, per se. Claudine had known Pansy since she was a child, all pale skinny limbs, a tiny sprite of a thing. But it was hard to wrap her mind around, because of course Theodore had known her just as long. Had he seen her recently and suddenly everything had just changed between the two of them? If so, it was troubling in some regard, if only because of her affiliations. Affiliations she and her son unfortunately shared, thanks to Thaddeus, but Claudine had hoped that a match from a culture that had nothing to do with Dark Lords and Death Eaters might be advantageous for Theodore. And if she was completely honest, keep him here, near her. She'd retreated permanently to Singapore after Thaddeus passed five years prior. There were even rumors she'd died, too, since she'd not been seen in Great Britain since.

"I don't know." Theodore's own brows, dark wings high over his eyes, like hers, knitted together.

Oh, this was interesting. Claudine leaned forward. "What do you mean? How can you not know if it's serious?"

"Because she's my best friend, Mum. Any blurring of that line seems serious, doesn't it?" His frown deepened. "We're not dating or anything." Claudine arched an eyebrow at this, but said nothing. "We just... ah. Something... happened after Draco's wedding. Something romantic in nature. And I do have, I don't know, certain feelings..."

It was fascinating watching her son muddle through all this in real time, but Claudine worried that if he frowned any harder, his beautiful face might become stuck that way. Thaddeus' frown had become permanent, at some point, and that had been a dreadful development. She interrupted him.

"Certain feelings like love?" She kept her voice carefully neutral. She was proud of that.

Theodore paused, cocking his head to one side while he considered his answer.

"Yes," he finally said, but he didn't sound happy about it. If Claudine were asked, she might have even said he sounded a bit anguished.

Theodore set aside his teacup, leaning forward to brace his elbows on his knees and bury his head in his hands. This was a posture she recognized. She'd seen it when Thaddeus had been arrested; Theodore had been all arms and legs at that point, but it was the same pose. Claudine set aside her own tea, and reached out very gently to lay her hand on the back of Theodore's neck.

"Why are you so upset about it?" she asked quietly.

Theodore lifted his head slightly. "Gods, for so many reasons. Because she's English and I don't think you want that for me. Because her father was a Death Eater and you'd like me to pull off the same trick Draco has. Because it's _Pansy_ and I've known her forever and never had any inkling that she liked me that way, until the other night, and I don't know if that was a one time thing, if it was just grief over Draco or if it was something more. Because I think I've loved her for a very long time and I feel like an idiot for just now realizing it."

Claudine was not used to such outbursts from her son. She could tell he was in an emotional turmoil. It hurt her heart a little, to see him like this. She did hate it when Theodore experienced any pain, whether it was a scraped knee or a bruised heart.

"Theodore," she said, giving his tense shoulders a little rub. "I cannot help you with that last bit. You're going to have to figure things out with Pansy for yourself. However. Are you really so worried about my approval?"

Theodore's head raised sharply, and he looked directly at his mother. "Of course I am. I don't think I could be happy with someone you disliked."

"Well, I don't dislike Pansy. So that's that. She might not be who I would have chosen for you, but..." Claudine paused. It was flattering that her opinion was so important to Theodore. Some of that was probably borne of his desire for harmony in his life at all times, she knew, but even so, she was pleased. "I met your father because my father brought him to our home for dinner, to celebrate a successful business deal."

Theodore knew this, but he let his mother continue. There was a point in this, and she'd reach it eventually.

"My father never intended Thaddeus to be a marriage prospect for me. He was foreign, he lived far away, and he was much older than I was. But when I laid eyes on your father the first time? I knew no one else would do. I wanted him more than I'd ever wanted anything in my whole life." Claudine's eyes grew a bit misty, thinking of how very young and how very besotted she'd been. "It was difficult. My father opposed it. Your grandfather Nott opposed it. Different cultures, both with very strict unspoken rules about who was an acceptable match, both obsessed with lineage and social standing. Purebloods. The 'Sacred 28'. Asians. Singaporean magical elite. There was so much against us." Claudine smiled, as if all this was a fond memory. "But we were so in love. We married anyway. We had you, and I love you even more than I could have imagined was possible."

Theodore reached for his mother's tiny hand, giving it a fond squeeze.

"I swore I would never put you through that. Oh, I suggested girls to you that I thought were appropriate. Can't blame a mother for dreaming, can you?" Claudine looked at Theodore with a twinkle in her warm brown eyes. "I will never stand between you and someone you truly love. Please take that from your shoulders, darling."

And as if her words had commanded it, the tension left Theodore's shoulders. He leaned over to give his mother a kiss on her cheek. "Thank you."

"Of course." She patted his shoulder. "Of course." She released a small sigh. She did not wish any heartache for her son. She hated that he felt things were so complicated. "So what will you do now?"

"Talk to Pansy, I suppose." The glum look was back, but it wasn't as ominous as before.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Theodore hadn't entirely expected Pansy to show up.

Pansy, herself, wasn't sure why she'd answered his invitation. Habit, she supposed. Curiosity, too, perhaps. And maybe that small burgeoning hope she'd felt upon receiving his owl.

While Theo had been in Singapore, Pansy had kept herself busy. St Mungo's was always full of distractions, intriguing cases and normal childhood ailments alike. During lulls in the action, however, Pansy had found herself replaying the night of Draco's wedding, keenly aware of the feelings that had blossomed inside of her, and dully wondering if Theodore was horrified or frightened or just indifferent. Only very late at night, when her head was hitting the pillow, in those moments before exhaustion overtook her, did Pansy allow herself to wonder if perhaps Theodore was feeling very much like she was feeling.

Theodore waited for her under the silvery light of the moon. The moon loved him, highlighted the angles of his face and made his raven dark hair gleam. The lazy rush of the river provided a soundtrack to his waiting. Would she, wouldn't she? But in the end, she did, apparating a few feet from him, her Healer's uniform tucked away in an oversized handbag that looped over her arm. She'd come straight away from work. That had to mean something, didn't it? It could mean she was here to tell him off, true, but he didn't think so. Her face didn't look angry. It looked wary.

Pansy was envious of how good Theo looked, bathed in moonlight. She felt an impossible mess, her hair tied back in a sloppy bun, wearing the comfortable clothing she always wore under her uniform. She realized Theodore was looking at her like she was gorgeous.

She stepped forward, breaching the distance between them. She didn't reach for him, though, even though when they'd been nothing more than friends, she would have flung her arms about him and smacked his cheek with a kiss.

"What did you need to tell me, Theo?" she asked, foregoing all social niceties. That's what his owl had said. _Pansy, I need to tell you something._

"Pansy." Theodore swallowed, uncharacteristically solemn. "I need to tell you... I love you. And I'm sorry."

"You love me, and you're sorry," she echoed, dropping her bag on the ground so she could put her hands on her hips. "What are you sorry for?"

"For leaving like that. For not telling you how I was feeling sooner. I've loved you a very long time, you know, but I thought..." He cut himself short, his full lower lip catching in his teeth.

"You thought what?" Pansy's voice was tart. She had her suspicions, but she wanted to hear him say it.

Theo sighed, running hand back through his hair. "I thought you were still in love with Draco."

"Not for ages, thank you." Not since he'd broken her heart in sixth year. She'd cried, lots, and then she'd slowly gotten over it. Pansy pursed her lips. "And?"

"And I thought my mum would object."

"Well, you ran off to Singapore, I presume. So what's the verdict?" Pansy fought a wave of irritation. He was confessing love, after all, which was more than she'd dared to hope for when he'd vanished so abruptly and gone radio silent. But she was awfully tired of men and their mothers.

"She's cheering me on, actually." Theodore still felt a bolt of wonder at that. All his fretting, for naught. "But it doesn't matter."

"Doesn't it?" Pansy's heart was thudding in her chest. She hated this. She loved this. It was maddening.

"No." Theodore looked at her quite seriously, his expression soft. "Because I love you."

There it was again. _I love you._ Pansy thought she should probably say it in return. She didn't. She said, instead, "Why do you love me?"

Theodore did smile then, perhaps sensing victory was close at hand. "You're my best friend. You make me laugh more than anyone else. When I have good news, you're the first person I want to tell it to. You are so smart, and kinder than anyone realizes. You look incredible in a swimsuit. You know me better than just about anyone I can think of. You're incredible in bed-"

"How would you know?" Pansy said, interrupting him. Her face had broken into a smile, too, and she flashed it impishly at Theo. "We've never been in a bed together."

Theodore grinned, sharp as a razor blade. "Yes, well, 'you're incredible in the grass' doesn't sound quite as romantic. Perhaps we'll end up in bed together and my assessment will be retroactively true?" 

"There's a strong possibility," Pansy admitted, finally closing the last bit of distance between them and twining her arms about Theo's neck.

"Pansy?"

"Hmmm?" Pansy murmured, lost in looking at him, and feeling her body pressed against his.

"You're sort of killing me here."

Pansy's eyes went wide. "Oh!" She laughed; she couldn't help it. "I love you, too. Yes. Of course I do."

"Thank Merlin." He fit his mouth to hers, the kiss soft, and gentle, and deep with feeling.

When the kiss broke, Pansy was smiling up at Theodore, her hand tracing the defined line of his jaw. "Can we go for a swim?"

"It _is_ hot out." Theodore pulled away slightly. The air was humid around them, practically begging for them to cool off in the water.

Pansy let go of Theodore, so she could strip off her leggings and tunic. She ran out to the river, no hesitation as her feet hit the water.

Theodore ran after her. He knew he would follow her anywhere.


End file.
